mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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