Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
