Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize