I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I am one with the molecules
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