No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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