Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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