haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I'm really into asian looking animals
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
