hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
