It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I think your dad took our porno
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
