sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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