Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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