She's JV to your varsity
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
