I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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