hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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