i think i have herpe
just one?
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
