I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
