as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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