Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Randomize
