my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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