Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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