So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
