I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
