Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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