This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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