i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Randomize
