No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
