Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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