His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
