How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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