I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
