hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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