Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
