he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
