Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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