I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
