id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
