What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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