I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
