There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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