I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
