Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
