As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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