Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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