Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I have aggressive nipples.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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