so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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