no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
