She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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