after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
