is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
