: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
